The truth of the matter is, the bad guy is attractive because either a woman wants to ‘fix' him or she just doesn't respect herself enough to see she's worth more than what he has to offer. Men and women alike can blind themselves to being treated badly for any number of reasons, including believing that they aren't a prize themselves.

That fear is what causes some to hesitate entering into long-term relationships much less marriage because they are afraid it will be too confining or that the trade-offs won't be worth it. Commitment itself seems to be uttered in the same breath as claustrophobia.

"I want to have someone to hold me, someone who really knows me and loves me." My friend Alice lamented. "At this point I'd settle for dinner or a round of putt-putt." She sighed. As a young twenty-something, her social calendar lately was filled, not with dating, but with bridal showers and weddings. Love was in the air, but not for Alice.

Ohn didn't realize that I'd had a crush on him for months. He was funny, cute, and easy to be with and I wanted nothing more than to be his girlfriend. His hesitant statement made me both elated and confused. What exactly was he saying? Was he asking me out? Or simply stating that he'd like to-- sometime. And what was that "maybe" part doing in there? What did he expect me to say?

It is important to remember that the end of any relationship gives us cause to grieve. Breaking up with someone is like experiencing a death - the death of the relationship, of you being loved by that person, of your hopes and dreams for the future with that person.

Take yourself out on dating! Discover the value of quiet, of being alone. You may even start a journal and find a favorite little cafe to go and sit and write for hours. Appreciate saying, "A table for one, please."

It is a very vulnerable and emotional time for you. If you meet somebody that you're certain is Mr. or Ms. Right, wait! If they're right for you, then they'll be right for you four months down the road. You don't want to start a relationship with someone just because lonely and hurting. It isn't fair to them or to you. Enjoy the time alone and enjoy being yourself for a little while.

It's not as easy as all that, not even for the ones who make it look that easy. Everyone feels a bit of nervousness when they approach a stranger for the first time. Whether it's someone you know in passing or someone you've just met, there's that faintly ill feeling in the pit of your stomach. The difference between you and the guy or girl who's doing what you want to be doing is that they grab their confidence by the neck and carry it with them.